FREE

FREE....said (or rather typed) it again. This is my One Little Word or 2012. For those of you that do not know what One Little Word is, it is a "project" started by an insanely awesome scrapbooker, Ali Edwards. The idea behind it is that you choose a word for the year, a word that you decide on that you can use to work with all year, for whatever reasons you are needing or choosing. It's a word for you to focus your intentions on, for personal growth so to speak. Now, what Ali has done (as I'm sure she didn't come up with the entire concept of focusing on a word for yourself), is to incorporate that word into a scrapbook album.

I'm really excited to be a part of the process this year. In fact, I've tried to participate with this for a couple years now but in the past I somehow didn't have the focus I needed, nor the desire I think, to actually work on this. This year is different. I am finding myself in a place where I am needing to focus on myself in a few different areas and the word FREE is what totally speaks to me. I'm also excited because I really enjoy scrapbooking but for the past couple years I've sort of let it go in my life. This project of creating an album will be just the jump start I am hoping for to bring me fully back into scrappy mode! Ta dah...two fabulous reason to have my One Little Word!

Why FREE? I have several reasons for choosing the word FREE for myself this year:


1. I want to be FREE to say "no" and not feel guilt about it. For all of my life to date, I have been someone who feels horrible saying no to someone. It totally stresses me out when someone asks something of me and I know I don't want to, or can't do it for them yet I say yes because I either don't want to hurt them or make them mad at me. Instead, I get mad at myself and I'm tired of that! I have a right to say "no". I don't intend to be hurtful when doing this, but I am not going to do things that I know I don't want to or that I know are not good for me, just to save someone else's feelings. FREE!

2. I want to be FREE from this house. Now, before you go all getting "how ungrateful are you, Cricket?" let me just say I totally appreciate that I've had this home for the past 11 years. I'm also extremely thankful that Roger offered up to let me stay in the house until Mandi graduates high school, thus allowing me to save some money and have a familiar place to rest my head. I'm also very thankful that Roger has since also told me that he has no intention of asking me to leave right after Mandi graduates and can stay as long as I need. So, what do I mean by FREE from this house? I want to move on with life after divorce, after Roger, and it's very difficult to fully do that while living in "our" home with all it's memories. The home we built together, living on the furniture we picked out and used etc. It's also no longer "our" home or even "my" home (legally) and I want to be FREE from all the "ghosts" that live here with me. I want my own home, one that I build and create. One where I'm making new, happy memories in! FREE!

3. I want to be FREE from some personal issues that today, I am not feeling FREE to discuss. I am working on this one very hard, it's the hardest of them all and will talk about it soon. Again, I will be FREE to talk and feel good about doing it. FREE!

4. I want to be FREE from my constant worry over money. Now, I'm not talking financial freedom (although that would be nice), but more FREE from financial worry. I'm living a different life and lifestyle now that I'm divorced and it's taking some getting used to. Now, I realize I have it pretty good. I am not hurting in any way and I have way more than a lot of people do and I try to remind myself of that. It's just different and a change and I need time to come to terms with it. FREE!

Those are just a few of the things that my One Little Word, FREE will help me with. I'm looking forward to feeling FREE in all of these areas and then some, but I'm most excited for the process. There is something about digging in and getting down to the nitty gritty of my life that feels really good. I know this will be cathartic for me and I look ahead with excitement and wonder at the person I will become! I promise to take you all along on the journey. It's gonna be a ride! Sometimes a roller coaster and sometimes a merry-go-round but nonetheless, fun! Strap yourself in and hang on...here we go!

Until next time,
Blessings!

TGIF

Wow, the first week of January 2012 is almost over...hard to believe! Wasn't it just yesterday I was celebrating 2011's arrival?

I got knocked down the first of this year with a nasty sinus infection and upper respiratory infection. I don't often just run to the doctor's office, not because I don't believe in the medical profession, but the hassle of it all just really annoys me! LOL! However, after a week of trying to heal myself, I knew that it was time to seek some professional help. I'm happy to say, I am now almost healed up and feeling sooo much better!

I'm dedicated to keeping myself healthy and have slacked off a bit. I think with the slacking, the holiday craziness, burning the candle at both ends, it finally caught me. I haven't been that sick in some time. I decided that I was not going to revisit that kind of illness anytime soon, so it's back to my healthy ways. However, that said, I have made some adjustments to my behaviors, all healthy I assure you, but some are different. It ties into a lot of soul searching and self-evaluating I've been doing the past few months. I'll share more of that in a separate post soon! But, needless to say, it's definitely something that I've been needing to address and I am feeling much better in the process.



This morning I was spending some time on Pinterest (oh how I love Pinterest) and I saw a pin for a banana oatmeal smoothie! It totally interested me, so much so that I looked at my Health and Wellness board and low and behold I had pinned it already! LOL! So, I went to the site and looked at the recipe. It looked really delish, but a little more than I wanted, both in the calorie arena and the quantity. Since smoothies don't often "keep" well, I decided to google some oatmeal smoothie recipes and found a fabulous site: Kath Eats. This gal has tons of great recipes on healthy eating and she also has a serious love affair with oatmeal! I was lucky enough to find a yummy recipe she posted for a Raspberry Blast Smoothie with oatmeal included. Now, I have to admit, oatmeal was not something I enjoyed as a child or even a young adult. I often found it to be just a pasty, non-tasty glob of goo sitting in my bowl! The past year or so, I've developed a real like for oatmeal! In fact, I even crave it as such was the case this morning after seeing the banana smoothie pin. Fortunately I had everything (except Raspberries so I used Strawberries instead) in my fridge and pantry so I made one for myself! It was soooo yummy, and thanks to my Vitamix, it blended up perfectly! I liked how Kath ate her smoothie like soup in a bowl, how cool! I poured mine into a bowl, topped it off with a couple teaspoons of my favorite Kashi granola (Cocoa Beach), grabbed a cute little wooden spoon I think is fun and that was breakfast today! It was just enough to keep me feeling full and satisfied until lunch!

I've always been a fan of smoothies and am so happy to be adding an Oatmeal Smoothie into my repertoire! I'll share my recipe here for you in case you're interested, I tweaked Kath's just a little for what I had on hand!

Strawberry Banana Oatmeal Smoothie:

1 C. Non-fat milk
1 C. Frozen strawberries (any berry would work)
1/2 Banana
1/3 C. non-fat vanilla flavored Greek yogurt
1/4 C. rolled oats
1 tsp. Flax seeds

blend!!

Let me know if you try it and what you think!

Until next time,
Blessings!

2012

Here I am at the beginning of a new year and I am full of anticipation. I am looking at 2012 as being my best year yet! I have a lot of things I am going to be working on, mainly on myself and I am eagerly looking forward to not only the challenge but the results I am hopeful of obtaining.

I've never been one to make "resolutions". I think that it sets a person up for failure and guilt and I don't want nor do I need to set myself up for any of that! I can't imagine going into a restaurant, sitting down at the table, ordering off the menu and saying "sure, I'll take an order of failure with a side of guilt, please!" Nope, not going to happen in my world. I'm already setting a course of action for myself that will take a lot of my energies, adding in "resolutions" to the mix will only serve to make my original plans more difficult.

Instead, I am looking at a list of "realizations"! Things that I've come to realize over the course of this past year, maybe even my lifetime but that I've been too stubborn or naive or just plain scared to admit to. I think this post today will start off my new year with my list of realizations. I'm also thinking that this list will probably grow and change as my year does and, well, that's a good thing, right?

Here are a few to start my new year with:

1. I'm a short hair girl. Why oh why do I think that time and time again I should grow my hair out? Why is it that I can't be content with the haircut that I truly feel good in, that gains me complements from others and that makes me just plain feel good!? It's short, it's easy and I like it. I am putting down the fantasy of ever having my hair long. I'm okay with it. It's not my dislike of short hair that fuels my need to grow it out but society and it's image of a beautiful woman with flowing long hair that keeps me in a cycle of discontent. Not anymore!

2. I am not a vegetarian anymore. There, that was a big one! I believe that we all go through cycles of our life where our diets and eating habits work for us and then one day, they don't work as well anymore. Since the summer I have added into my diet chicken and fish and I have come to realize that my body just feels better! I am not a fan of red meat, of pork, lamb, or any other types of "meats", just don't have the pallet for them and never will, but I do enjoy some chicken and fish and am not going to "not" eat them in order to keep up a label that I put on myself years back. Labels do not serve anyone well and I'm tired of mine, so I'm saying goodbye to the label! Whew, that feels great!!

3. I am not a photographer! LOL...many of you might be saying "duh, girl, you are no where near a photographer, why would you even think that??" well, it's because I think that for so many of us in the scrapbooking world, where we enjoy the documentation of our memories, we have become increasingly more and more aware of the "photography" aspect of it. Now it's not to say that I don't want to take a nice picture, but the reality of it for me is this, I don't have an eye for photography in it's creative sense. I also don't have the desire to learn how to use a big, fancy camera (even though I own one). I am just a basic, point and shoot kinda girl. A snapshot kinda girl. I'm okay with it. Isn't it really about documenting and capturing the moment, not "is the white balance correct?" or "are the Hue and Saturation or Curves and Levels correct?" I can use Photoshop to help adjust some minor tweaks in a picture if I so choose but I want to let go of the need to have "the perfect shot" every stinkin' time I take a picture! Anyone know of someone interested in buying a gently used Canon DSLR with a bunch of lens'?

4. I don't do enough of the things I enjoy because I spend way too much time on the computer. Wow, this one will be hard but I seriously needed to realize just how much time I waste sitting on the computer looking at Pinterest, Facebook, blogs, message boards etc, when i could be spending that time reading books I love, baking, scrapbooking, sewing, or dancing in my bedroom to some good 70's music..(yeah, I tend to do that...lets keep it our secret...K?).

5. As for my "creative" self, I realize that a lot of what I admire in the papercrafting and art world, while beautiful and stuff I'd like to create, are just not areas of art or creating that I can do. It's just not my art. That doesn't mean I can't admire it, pin it to pinterest, enjoy seeing it, but I am letting go of the fantasy that I can do it too. I'm not cutting myself short here, just realizing what my style is, what my creativity is and being okay with that. In addition to this, I will soon be purging out my "studio" and getting rid of all the things I don't use that I only had because of envy and admiration. I want to be realistic. I think it will be nothing short of a great way to jump start me back into my creative mode!

These are just a few of the realizations I am coming to as I enter into 2012. This year will already be a big one for Mandi and me. Lots of changes coming up in the next 6 months, some good, some bittersweet, some hard, but I will be approaching all of them with hope and faith!


Until next time,
blessings!